What I've Learned at 32 Weeks

Well...we made it!!  32 weeks was our first milestone since leaving the hospital, and we actually made it.  The next goal set is for 34 weeks.  Let's see how we do.  Overall, it doesn't seem that anything has changed.  Bentley is staying put, though he's quite a mover and shaker (I guess he gets that from his Mommy)!  He's been in the same position (for the most part) for weeks.  Head down, his back is on my left side, and his hands and feet are on my right side.  All too often I feel something boney (hand or foot) poking out my right side, and his back humped up on the left side.  I think he's doing yoga. :)  He gets the hiccups every time I eat, and sometimes in between meals.  Speaking of them, he has them now!  All this movement was great when I first felt it, but now it makes me feel queasy.  Sometimes his movements are so big that they make me feel nauseous.  Oh well...his moving around lets me know he's okay, so I'll deal with the rest.

Okay...Now, let's go over what I seem to have learned during these last few weeks.

1. Bedrest stinks!!  (Daniel has renamed it "house arrest.") - Though I don't have to be flat on my back all the time, NO ONE needs this much rest!
2. Resting physically forces you to rest mentally. - I understand that I need to rest my body, but my brain needs stimulation.  Internet access, puzzles, books, and TV/movies can only keep you occupied for so long. 
3. Resting can actually make you feel worse! - I feel best while I'm up getting my shower.  As soon as I sit down to do my make-up or start "resting" for the day, I start feeling really crummy.  Daniel says that I feel "blah."
4. It is MUCH harder to rest at home than at the hospital. - I am lucky enough to have family and friends to help me clean my house and cook my meals, but do you know how badly I want to clean my own house and cook my own meals for a change?  I know I'll regret saying that someday, but right now...that's how I feel.  I want my independence back!!
5. People love me! - I've griped on all my other lessons learned, so I'll state the obvious on this one.  There have been so many people to step up and take care of me and my family during this time.  I am so, so, SO, SO, SO grateful for each and every person that has called, emailed, cooked, cleaned, and prayed for me. 

As grateful as I am, though, I cannot wait to get back to my old self.  I want to feel good...Really Good.  I cannot even remember what "normal" feels like anymore.  I also want to do things for other people rather than relying on everyone to do things for me.  I want to be able to go to dinner with my husband and enjoy a glass of wine as he looks at me in something besides pajamas or sweat pants.  I want my friends to be able to visit me somewhere besides my house, where the topic of discussion is always "How do you feel?"  I want to have a happy, healthy baby, which is why I'm doing all this other stuff in the first place.  It all comes full circle, huh?  We do what we have to do.  There will come a day when I can't even remember how much I dislike this situation, so for now, we'll just wait it out. 

Now that I've vented a bit, we'll go back to the good news...We made it to 32 weeks!  YIPPEE!!